Thursday, October 8, 2009

goodbye to one of our own

Meleanie Hain, the woman who made national news for practicing her legal right to open carry at her child's soccer game, was shot and killed by her husband who then, by all accounts, turned the gun on himself.

But this is not about guns.

This is not about the Brady Campaign and its inevitable celebration of her death. It's not about the Second Amendment. It's not about "I told you so" or "chicks with guns" or "live by the gun, die by the gun" or "pull the trigger."

This is about a love story so toxic that no one survives...a tragic tale played out time and again in homes across the country - he abused her, she tried to leave him, and so he killed her. It's not about the tool that he used to accomplish that.

We may never know the details of what led to Meleanie's death but we do know a little about her life - a small town soccer mom who fought back when her Second Amendment rights were threatened, she braved scrutiny and derision from all sides*.

Meleanie was a pleasure to interview on Gun Nuts Radio and I'm so very glad that she had an opportunity to let herself be heard beyond all those 10-second soundbites on local news. I feel quite lucky to have been able to speak to, and learn from, her. She was a passionate, knowledgeable advocate for the right to bear arms and will be much missed in the 2A community.

In standing up for herself, she stood up for all of us.

Thank you, Meleanie, and may you rest now in peace.


* yes, even by some of our own - which led to quite a lot of healthy debate.

30 comments:

Weer'd Beard said...

I was hit pretty hard by this news. I often spoke about Meleanie because of the constant match-up between Soccer Mom Her, and professional gun banners….and how she always came out on top!

I would like to thank You and Caleb for having Gun Nuts, listening to your interview with Meleanie this morning helped the pain.

pdb said...

"It is foolish and wrong to mourn the women who died. Rather we should thank God that such women lived." -- Gen George S. Patton. (I think the original quotation was garbled in the transcription).

cybrus said...

Thank you. As part of the pafoa.org forum, I'd been lucky enough to get to know Meleanie a little bit. Thank you for remembering her for who she was and not for whatever legacy was forced upon her.

Jeffrey Quick said...

Oh God no...
Figures somehow that he'd be a Susine-American.

Dr. Feelgood said...

Tragic.

I did criticize her actions last year, and I haven't changed my assessment of that incident. I only hope that her children will be cared for and loved. I, too, lost my parents at a young age. With time and perspective I've come to understand and even appreciate the difficult circumstances of my life, in spite of persistent personal regret and profoundly screwed up familial relationships. May God preserve them as He has me.

And may Meleanie's example reach untold numbers of women who might choose to take responsibility for protecting themselves and their children, starting with my wife.

Old NFO said...

Meleanie was a shining example of what could be, this is tragic example or the reality of domestic violence and the impact on family. Thoughts and prayers sent for the family. One hopes she will not be forgotten...

Scott said...

Awww $**% when are some men going to figure out we left the dark ages and that women are not chattel or property. She wants to leave let her, you don't beat or kill someone you love. You wish them happiness. It isn't rocket science.

Yuri Orlov said...

This is a tragedy for everyone involved, but I especially feel horrible for the children. I hope they are well cared for and will be okay.

SpeakerTweaker said...

I heard about this over at JayG's place. I'll admit I actually choked up a bit when I read it.

Rest In Peace, Mrs. Hain, and thank you for fighting the good fight. May your courage carry on.



tweaker

Buckshot said...

Breda,

Just a little correction.

You said "This is about a love story so toxic that no one survives".

It might well have been toxic, but no matter how toxic it was, someone DOES survive, the child or children she was so intent on protecting.

I don't think I would ever want that child or those children to get the idea THEY were toxic or the product of a toxic relationship.

Right to the end, she evidently managed to do that, it is NOT a story of "Man kills family and then himself"!

I just hope that the child or children do not fall in the hands of someone anti-gun who uses their mother's death as a reason to brainwash them, especially since she probably did a good job of getting them started on a good path about firearms.

Buckshot

Wai said...

Makes you wonder if she got that gun to defend herself from her husband, or what?

mikeb302000 said...

It's wrong what you said, Breda. "It's not about the tool that he used to accomplish that." It certainly is about the gun. When an abusive husband strikes out at the wife with a gun, she's more likely to die. You keep denying this by saying people can kill and commit suicide with other "tools," but not nearly as effectively.

Guns are bad news for women, Breda. Not in every single case, but too often. This sad story illustrates it.

pdb said...

Yeah, because not having a gun saved Nicole Simpson and Ron Goldman from being killed by a jealous ex-husband.

mikeb302000, you are a moron and a coward and should be ashamed of yourself for using this tragedy to advance your agenda.

Unix-Jedi said...

It certainly is about the gun.


Funny thing, Mike...

You keep saying that you "don't know" and you "Haven't made up your mind".

And then you refute that by saying things like that.

We know you're lying, Mike. I'm just worried you don't know that.

Guns are bad news for women, Breda. Not in every single case,

Ah, so how many cases? And how many cases where they save someone (even a woman's) life?

You'll claim ignorance, again, as you dance in the "blood in the streets." That's the real spectacle, not law-abiding people protecting themselves and their families - but you, those who love to hear of massacres so you can mentally jack-off to the thoughts of those people being killed, so you can demand that the tool - not the person - be demonized.

We're quite used to you and yours slaughter fetishes, but it doesn't mean we have to condone it.

Your inability to be even marginally gracious in the face of the facts of the case, which undermine your dishonest agenda is equally telling.

Go masturbate somewhere else. We're mourning the loss of a friend, you're celebrating her death so you can subjugate the weak, primarily women.

It's unseemly, it's sickening, and it's the current Liberalism thought process on display.

Top of the Chain said...

MikeB wrote:

It's wrong what you said, Breda. "It's not about the tool that he used to accomplish that." It certainly is about the gun. When an abusive husband strikes out at the wife with a gun, she's more likely to die. You keep denying this by saying people can kill and commit suicide with other "tools," but not nearly as effectively.

Long ago the World Health Organization found that removing an easy and favored method of suicide was not likely to effect the overall rate of suicide. Other methods were and are available. Just because guns are more readily available here, according to your logic Mike, we ought to be killing ourselves off left and right. It just doesn't happen here. In gun free Japan, the suicide rate is double what it is here in the states. But you Mike, will always use emotion to rule your life and thought.

Steve said...

Decision: MikeB is an idiot. Move along, nothing else to see there.

Unfortunately, Meleanie's husband probably caught her when she wasn't looking. He was a contemptable coward, and hopefully, whoever will be raising her children will enable them to be able to see that someday.

Tom said...

God bless you Melanie for what you did, what you tried to do, and for knowing what was right.


@MikeB

Hey jackass...WHERE WERE THE POLICE YOU WORSHIP? What did they do besides mop up, as usual? What's more the alleged shooter had a nice list of "only one" jobs, you know, those who are supposedly more worthy of having guns. Maybe she was following your rules with the gun locked up and inaccessible.

I just don't have the words for how much I hate you. Honestly I wouldn't put it past you to have pulled the trigger yourself to prove your point. Can't make an omelet and all that. Anti-rights/gun/life asses like you don't (or can't due to mental illness) give a damn about the victim.

Sorry for the rant Breda, but I won't sit back and let this ass flap his vampiric gums about the dead while everything he professes is once again shown to be a steaming pile.

mikeb302000 said...

Nice friends you've got, Breda. They're big on name-calling it seems.

The fact is, I'm not exploiting this tragedy any more than you guys are.

Where are all those stories of the gun saving the woman's life? Stories like this one, unfortunately, are in the main stream every single day. You have to go to Clayton Cramer's blog to find the others. Why is that? Is that because DGUs by women are so common?

Why do some of you get so nasty and aggressive when I ask things like that? Why so defensive? I'll tell you why, because you know or at least suspect you're in the wrong.

Top of the Chain said...

MikeB,

Do we make you own a gun? NO!

Do we allow you, your opinion, YES!

Do we wish that no one was ever murdered again, by any means? YES

Quit making us who CHOOSE to carry and own a firearm into second class citizens. We are Damn sick and tired of it. You are a bigot and are the social equivalent of a member of the KKK. Quit trampling on my civil right to own arms.

Unix-Jedi said...

Nice friends you've got, Breda. They're big on name-calling it seems.

We're also honest, forthright, and steadfast.

Where are all those stories of the gun saving the woman's life? Stories like this one, unfortunately, are in the main stream every single day.

So now you'd subjugate women to 2nd class citizens. How patronizing of you.

You're masturbating in blood, and it's sickening.


You have to go to Clayton Cramer's blog to find the others. Why is that? Is that because DGUs by women are so common?

Complete non-sequitur. As for positive views of guns, you won't find it in the press, that's been covered with you many times - you're being dishonest by "asking" that.

Why so defensive? I'll tell you why, because you know or at least suspect you're in the wrong.

Because we know you'd like to disarm people and then order people with guns - like Mrs. Hain's husband - to make us do your bidding, or else.

No deal.

A woman getting ambushed and shot in the back is not a failure of her gun.
Your celebration of her death is despicable. Your encouragement of rapists and murderers is pathological.
Where's your normal disclaimer that "you haven't made your mind up", and "you haven't studied?"....

Are you finally retiring those canards?

Bad things happen. Only a fool insists on putting themselves at the mercy of the moralless and hope that they change the human condition.
But then, we've known you a fool for a long while.
Now we know you have no decency and relish in disaster and celebrate evil.

TJP said...

I don't follow the logic that a capable, healthy male in his 30s, in a physically demanding line of work, was entirely incapable of deadly violence without a gun in his hand. That requires an active imagination. Maybe a weapon channels The Force, or Voodoo powers, or ELF waves? Tolkien exhibited more restraint describing the corrupting influence of an inanimate object in book that largely involves magic and midgets running around with swords.

Though I do understand the desire to present the weapon and the crime, with no other supporting evidence, and suggest that there is a direct relationship. That's far easier to do than explain the portion of violent crime perpetrated without a gun, or the mysteriously undocumented 60 million homicides that should also have been caused by the estimated 60 million guns lying around in U.S. households. Or even to present irrefutable evidence that violence was not part of human behavior prior to the invention of the firearm.

On an entirely unrelated note, I've canceled my car insurance policy because it did not prevent someone from backing into my car.

Anonymous said...

Sheesh! What kind of retards hope the kids will still learn to **love** what killed their momma?

Yeah, oh my, I can't even comment on how stupid that idea is.

I'm really trying to be polite. Honestly.

Unix-Jedi said...

What kind of retards hope the kids will still learn to **love** what killed their momma?

Government employee?

They're just a fact of life, whether they've orphaned you or not.

Mike W. said...

Anon - Their deceased father?

I'm guessing they'll have a hard time forgiving him for what he did.

Also, you may have been "trying" to be polite, but you failed miserably.

Tom said...

Maybe Anon meant the police/security-industrial complex?

Anonymous said...

Meleanie Hain and John Tabutt's wife are much more representative of the relationship between women and guns than the gun-nut fantasy of SuperheroGal saving herself from RapeMan with her trusty .38. Tabutt had a gun in the house for protection--saw an 'intruder' in the house one night and fired--turned out the intruder was his wife. Who is now dead.

Rick R. said...

Mike --

The gun was used by the ONLY person you would WANT to have a gun in that situation (by your own words).

The killer was a COP.

So, your assertion is now that "cops having guns is bad for women."

Bob said...

Some of these posts irritate me! this is a tragic story of a brave lady who stood up for her beliefs,and about the coward who ended her life. this was loose/loose all the way. I read someones who said it would be stupid for the kids to like guns after this, What are you talking about? Are you saying if some dies from a drunk driver, they will never drive, because a car killed thie loved one? or if they fell off a ladder the kids shouldn't like ladders. The fact is she was shot to death by a person. the gun didn't load itself, did not transport itself to the scene, it did not aim itself, and it also did not activate its trigger.

Anonymous said...

If this family would have had no guns in the household, I don't believe anyone would have died.

From what I've read, I believe they both had children from previous relationships. That means that they both had relationships that had ended where no one died.

I believe this famly simply had too many guns and not enough sense.

Bob said...

Anonymous you still don't get the point. where I live in the past few years a couple of men killed their wives with knives, another was beat to death. why don't you people want to face the fact that some people do bad things, you can't blame it on the gun , knife,bat,car,airplane, etc. we are still animals and some of us animals loose control, or never had it. We can live in denial of mans faults, but it doesn't make it so, just because we don't want to believe. In my opinion people need to get over it and live life, not fear it.