Friday, December 3, 2010

time didn't fly

284.

That's how many days have passed between getting rear ended (twice) and the chiropractor finally releasing me from care - saying that he's done all he can do for me, that I'll probably need treatment for the rest of my life, that I should expect flare-ups and occasional headaches, and that, oh, if only I hadn't turned my head before the second impact.

I'll always have something to remember this by - a soft tissue souvenir, if you will.

Suffice it to say, it has not been the better part of my year.

If I had to find a silver lining at all I'd have to say that it was that I've learned a lot during this time - about insurance, chiropractics, lawyers, occipital nerves, electrostim machines, and the court system. Most importantly, however, I learned a some things about myself.

Namely that there is indeed pain that I cannot tough out and that my capacity for anger is near limitless.

The former feeds the latter, you see, and perhaps someday I'll find the end...but not today.

17 comments:

Lissa said...

Rajah offers to knead your neck any time you're in the neighborhood!

ViolentIndifference said...

*hug*

James R. Rummel said...

I'm sorry you have to endure this, Breda. Seems you have had more than your share of rocky roads.

Mike W. said...

Sorry to hear you're still feeling like crap.

FYI - Quick Google search shows that "Imagine Salon & Spa" near you does deep tissue massage. Might be worth a shot.

Ruth said...

definetly consider massage, I find it makes a HUGE difference in the way my back and neck feel (and I have permenent spine deformation due to extreme bad posture as a child). I also recommend Tiger Balm (specifically the brand name, not the various knock-offs). Applied regularly at night before bed it makes an amazing difference as well.

Newbius said...

We, your friends, will help in any way we can. Massage, aromatherapy (Hoppe's), Aromatherapy (gunpowder), Recoil Therapy (rifles), Recoil therapy (everything else), Target acquisition and spotting...

Whatever it takes.

ViolentIndifference said...

Newbius has an excellent point. If it takes taking you out to the range every day, your friends can rotate their schedules to get that to happen. I'd donate ammo... :-P

Old NFO said...

Breda- You know we'd do anything to help if we could... Truly sorry you have not fully recovered.

Chris said...

My car was rear-ended 2.5 years ago, resulting in severe lower back pain. A chiropractor was able to make it bearable, as long as I keep many activities to a minimum. So, I know how you feel, and my heart goes out to you. The insurance company of the driver that hit us (mine was car #3 of 4 in a chain-reaction) is fighting hard to avoid paying anything, so I am guessing your comment about insurance companies and lawyers means a similar experience. I wish you the best! (And from reading your blog for a bit over a year, I have little doubt that you will push right on through this.)

Mr. Casey said...

I invoke the dark spirits of the bogs and hollow, swamp and mire to render unto your adversaries the pain you dwell in but tenfold! Oh, were it that easy. I believe in justice but so much more I believe in vengeance.

I fell four years ago and smashed my face into a solid marble floor. Eventually, the insurance company told my neuro-psychotherapist that I was all better, despite his reports to the contrary. After years of building puzzles, playing word games and struggling with memory and minor (praise be!) motor skills issues, I found that meditation, yoga and massage worked wonders on the carcass that carries my wet works.

I sincerely hope you are able to maintain a high quality of life, enjoy your many blessings and someday see the horrific report of your rammer slammer's demise in your local paper!

Jay G said...

It does get better, Breda.

It takes time - a lot of time - but it will get better. After my wreck, it took a good two years before my back stopped hurting so badly that I had to take 12 Advil a day.

Even now, when the weather changes or if I've lifted something too heavy, I'll get twinges that remind me of the accident (I got T-boned by a car coming out of a side street going about 40).

You will have occasional flare-ups.

It will suck.

You *will* continue to flinch when you see a car approaching you too quickly.

*BUT*

You pay better attention. You take better care of things.

You find out who your friends are, and who you're better off without.

And it does stop hurting. Not all at once, not in one big "ahhhhh", but little by little, over time.

It does get better. It *will* get better.

Lean on your friends and loved ones. We're here for you. Now and down the road.

Ruth said...

I have to add, not all massage therapy is the same, some people swear by deep tissue massage, I swear it leaves bruises. It took work for me to find a massage therapist with a method that worked for me, but it was worth the time, and is still worth the money once a month to walk out of that office pain free, at least temporarily!

Julie said...

sorry to hear that this is going to be lifelong breda - hugs

ViolentIndifference said...

Read your comments. You are certainly loved.

Breda said...

Thank you, I am quite humbled :)

Christina LMT said...

Dammit, Breda! Why do you live so far away from me? I would work on you for free.

I'm so sorry to hear about the on-going problems and wish there were something I could do besides sitting here, wringing my hands.

rickn8or said...

"...and that my capacity for anger is near limitless."

And I find this very frightening.