I made the mistake of watching Woman of the Year last night. Don't get me wrong, it's a terrific film. I love the beauty of black and white, the intimate acting of Kate and Spencer, the glimpses of lovely 1940's design.
It reminded me how bad I am at this housewife thing. Just horrible. I could totally relate to the character in the film. Sure, I can out-librarian the other librarians, shoot things that go bang and bang out a few sentences for my blog, no problem. I can paint and sculpt and do other things well too. (like cook. I'm a great cook. Soufflé anyone?) But this wife thing...I just suck at it. I know Mike doesn't care that much, but he works hard all day and....argh.
The house is a mess - piles of laundry higher than my ass, dishes in the sink. I'm overwhelmed. So I will spend today absolving and dissolving my bad wife guilt-induced funk in a flurry of scrubbing, vacuuming and bleach. And then? I will have dinner on the table.
8 comments:
You don't suck at being a wife. You suck at being a domestic.
BIG difference.
As long as you're there for Mike; if you cheer him up when he's feeling down; if you build him up when he tears himself down; if you stand up for him when others tear him down; if you are by his side through thick and thin; then you are a great wife.
Take a listen to "I'll Stand By You" by The Pretenders.
Then take him to the range. And stop making him clean YOUR guns. :)
It's a New Century and cleaning, laundry, and vacuuming are just chores these days - it's no the 1930's anymore, but even so I never saw Hepburn do any of that, she had servants didn't she? :-)
Laundry, schmaundry. You're 4'12. Your ass just ain't that high.
I agree with Jay.
Well I spent a great deal of my life at work, usually not close enough to be home at night. Sometimes for extended periods. Then a virus got me. My heart is irreparably damaged and is dying, but it is doing so slowly.
I can no longer do anything expected of a man in the way of work for any length of time. At least not physically.
My wife still works and she works damn hard. I am doing my best to hang around with her for as long as I can. I just love her, can't help it. Don't know why she loves me, but I am grateful for it.
So now I am the only housewife in my area with a penis. I'm not the best housewife you ever met, but she knows I love her and I care.
I suspect your husband knows the same about you.
Watch "Adam's Rib" instead. Same cast, but more equal domestic/professional sharing (and friendly - but fierce - competition). Tracy even wields a handgun! (although it's licorice.)
Eh, it's a matter of figuring out who likes/dislikes which chore the most/least. I cook, bc DH hates to, but he does laundry because it's a chore he doesn't mind. Balance it so everyone's happy, don't sweat it being "equal" or thinking you have to do it all (unless you're happy doing it all). The important thing is somehow coming up with food to eat, dishes to eat it on, and clean clothes to wear while you eat.
And if you still need ideas, check out www.flylady.net . It can be a bit much, and it's aimed at Stay-At-Home-Mom's, but her core ideas are sound. The point is to get stuff done, quickly, and move on to more interesting things, like shooting. :)
Wait a minute! A wife is supposed to do what?!?
You mean mine isn't supposed to be 110 miles away in another state studying her ass off and should be here cooking for me?
(God forbid, my wife isn't allowed in the kitchen!!)
All kidding aside, I'm really glad that the dynamic has changed since the 1940's; I've got to agree with Jay that "togetherness" is more important that yesteryear "sexual politic".
Wow. I said a big word!
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